Staff Biography: Austin

In order to make the readers more acquainted and familar with the people behind this blog and what all we do, I decided to compile a brief biography and survey of each member. This is it. It isn't much, but if you learn anything about the sordid minds behind this masterpiece, I have done my job.

Austin is an enigma and a certainty, a legend and an unknown. He grew up in Brooklyn and worked his way up through the journalism ranks until he was a regular columnist for the New York Times. Things were going well for our friend, Austin, and we were happy for him until the fateful incident last September. He was fired for inappropriately hugging a female employee, but we all know she just felt unworthy to be hugged by Austin and that was the only inappropriateness of the situation. Even after the court case proved him innocent, he couldn't get a job at any major newspaper again because of fears of other women feeling unworthy of his sexiness. Out of a job, he called his good friend Josh and implored him for a writing job. Well, he joined our little mafia and the rest is (will someday be?) history.

Full Name: Austin Kelly Fields

Role at the 38 Radius Blog: Intern with a post count record of 0-0

Birthday: March 9, 1990

Age: 17 (I look 27 and sometimes act about 5)

Job Status: I flip the almighty burger at Wendy's

Pets: A Greyhound and two fluffy cats

Car: 1997 Pontiac Grand Am GT

Favorite Bands: Two at the Wall. Of Montreal. The Killers. Underoath. Electrocute. Distance in Embrace. Mute Math. The Faint. Clap. Boys like Girls. Yeahyeahyeahs. The Postal Service. The Fitness.

Favorite Live Show: Two at the Wall.

Favorite Book: The Catcher in the Rye. I've read it 9 times through.

Favorite Movie: Eternal sunshine of the spotless mind.

Favorite TV Show: Family Guy or The Price is Right.

Favorite Animal: platypus for sure.

Ideal Meal: Japanese Chicken Terriyaki, white rice, ColdStone Ice Cream, Dr.Pepper, and a full Pez dispenser shaped like Bob Barker.

Most Embarrassing Moment: I block them all out. sorry.

Hobbies: Playing guitar, drawing, Myspacing, social conquests.

Things You Hate Wearing: Bra's and knee high socks.

Hottest Animated Character?: Patrick from Sponge-Bob Square Pants. He has a great figure, not too plump, and no sign of an eating disorder.

Little Known Super Power: Cheese grater-less cheese grating.

Thing You MUST Know About Me: I get up every saturday morning and listen to Polka on the radio... and dance.