The 'Official' Introduction to 38 Radius Land.

Alright guys, I should've done this to start out with, but I didn't get to. Within a few minutes of the blog's inception, Josh decides to log onto my computer and post about how he feels like an alcoholic. 'Nice job Josh. Now we don't get to post a proper introduction to the people' I said. He didn't care. He failed to comprehend how much more important introducing this blog was than his proclamations about Pepsi and alcohol were to the grand scheme of things. It wasn't meant to be that way, but that was how it happened and there was no way to correct it until now.
Jay just commerated our 100th post tonight and now I am finally getting around to writing the introduction, the dissertation, syllabus, white paper, take your pick. Anyways this is it...

Topics to be discussed:

-Music. We all like music here. We've got a varied taste and we will write about it as we please.

-Dumb people. You can't really stop stupidity. You can only sit back and mock it. Idiots are here to be mocked and we are here to mock them.

-Amazing people. These people are much more rare than dumb people and they deserve to be commended. Including (but not limited to) Andrew Schwab, Josh Scogin, Rasputin, Edgar Allan Poe, and ourselves.

-Stories of our existence. Many weird things have happened to me over the years and I'm certain weird experiences have fallen upon Josh, Vicious, and Jay too. I mean those ones about stealing chinese food, crapping in a lake, and the weird homeless guy that took our picture in California all need to be shared someday....

-Japanese Culture. Back in September, Vicious and I were browsing the internet at some absurd hour and game across a Japanese game show on YouTube. We have been hooked ever since and it is now our job to spread their amazingness throughout the world. Any culture that has a gameshow where punishment is getting spanked or nailed in the junk is a great culture if you ask me and they should be commended for their amazingness.

-Serious Posts. Yes, sometimes we get all insightful and decide to write something of actual significance and meaning. For me, it often comes after staying up too late and listening to too much J. Tillman, Damien Rice, or reading a book by C.S. Lewis. Either way, if you ever feel bombarded by these deep posts and don't know what to do. Go back in the archive and watch these Those always improve a day.

-Vincent Price. see 'Amazing People'

-Anything not listed below.

Now for part two here are the

Topics that are Strictly Forbidden:

-Satire. Satire and sarcasm are both low forms of humor that are overused and therefore, we shall avoid using them at all cost here in 38 Radius Land.

-Our ordinary days. This is not a journal or a diary for us. I'm not going to come home and be like 3:42 PM "My day was rough. I spilled my coffee on my shirt and it looked funny all day." That stuff is gay and not for us.

-Celebrity Gossip. What's this? You give a crap about Angelina Jolie adopting a kid? And you insist on calling celebrity couples by a combined name like TomKat or Brangelina? That's awesome, no really, it is. Tell me all about it as I drink ammonia flavored with arsenic.

-Carlos Mencia. Unless it is about him sucking big balls, BIG balls.

-Wilmer Valderamma. See Carlos Mencia. He annoys the bejeezus out of me.

-She Who Shall Not Be Named.

The Goal:

To spread our awesomeness throughout the galaxy until all are infected and have the dream and hope of becoming as awesome as us and even though their quest may be futile, they will have succeeded in trying.
Also, if we could get a really hot commenter that I could start dating and eventually have children with that would be awesome too...