Ah yes, basically the greatest day of the year, March 17. It's freaking St. Patrick's Day baby and this year it falls on a Saturday and let me tell you, St. Patrick's Day on a weekend is much greater than St. Patrick's Day on a weekday. If you have to ask why then you are clearly not my kind of person, but if you must know let me just say that work and hangovers do not go well together. This year there are no worries though. Just go to the bar and drink! It will be amazing and this is the only day of the year that green beer is readily available and that is simply an offer that no one should passs up. Green beer! I know it's been around for a while now, but I still can't wrap my mind around the fact that such a technology exists. I know you can probably get some green beer the day after for cheaper, but no one wants to do that. Then it just seems like you're drinking algae or something and there is nothing fun about drinking algae.
I know I'm not really Irish, but I don't think it matters. I have a U2 cd somewhere, but since they don't sing about screwing or drinking, I can't really respect them too much. That's not the point though, that makes me an honorary Irishman. I also saw a Colin Farrell movie or two so that counts towards my Irishnicity too.
I also love it when I see some oblivious idiot who isn't in the spirit of the day and isn't wearing any green. They don't know what they are getting themselves into. A lot of people say that pinching people on St. Patrick's Day for a lack of green is childish and immature except for with your best friend or with a lover and then it's sweet, but that is crap! They know very well the consequences of their choices; it's that simple. If you don't wear green on March 17, you are getting pinched. Call me immature, I call you stupid.
Someone asked me the other day if I even knew who Saint Patrick was. I thought he meant the starfish from Spongebob, apparently he didn't. Why does it even matter? All that matters now is that I get to drink excessively and not have to come up with an excuse for it. Priests can whine all they want about the secularisation of it, but I don't care. This is what ol' Patty would've wanted.
Anyways, I'm gonna go out to the bar for now and who knows, maybe I'll get lucky if you know what I mean. Oh boy, I just crack myself up.
3 comments:
"but since they don't drink about screwing or drinking"
U2 doesn't drink about screwing or drinking? Who woulda thought.....
Man, if all went as planned according to this post, you sure had a great night!
i wrote that at 3 in the morning so i think i'm allowed one or two mess-ups like that. it's fixed...
way to be an idiot
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